Joining a membership should feel like walking into a cozy coffee shop with vibey jazz coming through the speakers, your favorite table is open, the baristas greet you by name, and they probably already started your order when they saw you coming down the sidewalk.

Instead, many people get experiences like they just paid for their coffee and everything shut down.

They just paid. They’re pumped. They want to dive in right now.

Crickets. 

There’s no login, no welcome, no idea what to do next.

That’s how memberships lose people within the first 48 hours (or less, tbh). Their momentum fizzled out before they ever got to experience it. 

Let’s talk about how to stop that from happening and how to build onboarding that actually gives your members an onboarding experience worth sticking around for.

Why Membership Onboarding Is Key to Retention

Most membership owners think that onboarding is just sending a welcome email and it’s all good. I mean, it is something. 

But onboarding is actually your #1 retention tool. Here’s why:

• It tells members “you belong here, here’s how it works.”
• It prevents the awkward “uhhh, what do I do now?” radio silence.
• It builds trust and momentum from the start.
• It directly impacts whether members cancel within a week … or stick around for a year or more. 

A lot of people bounce early because they felt lost as soon as they joined. Access issues stopping them from even experiencing the content. Confusion about where to start. Not feeling like they actually belong.

In this post, I talked about my own experience where I didn’t get access until an entire week later – and was about to file a dispute because I hadn’t heard back after multiple emails.

People don’t generally want to go through the hassle of asking for a refund (especially when your refund policy states that no refunds will be given), or filing a dispute. 

Within the first couple of hours, my momentum vanished. The entire experience was an onboarding gap that broke trust.

 

The Mistakes That Send Members Running

The first moments after someone joins are crucial. They’ve just said yes to you — and they’re waiting for you to say yes back.

But this is where many memberships stumble. Instead of a clear path forward, new members hit roadblocks that instantly dim that excitement. Once the spark fades, it’s hard to bring it back.

Here are the four most common onboarding gaps I see over and over again:

No Access

Imagine buying a ticket to a concert you’ve been waiting for — and when you show up, the doors are locked. That’s what no access feels like to your new members.

They buy, they’re excited, and then … nothing. No product access, no confirmation, just radio silence. In those hours (or days), they’re left wondering: Did something go wrong? Should I email support? Did I just get scammed?

Meanwhile, that initial burst of enthusiasm is fading fast. The longer the wait, the more buyer’s remorse kicks in.

No Welcome Email

Access might be instant, but if the only message they get is the generic, platform-generated email? Oof.

That’s like walking into a party and nobody looks up to say hello. Sure, you’re technically in the room — but do you feel like you belong? Not really.

A missing (or flat, robotic) welcome email tells your members: “You’re just another transaction.” And that’s the opposite of what makes people stick around. Members want to feel seen, reassured, and excited that they’ve landed in the right place.

Broken Links

Few things kill momentum faster than broken links. Your member is pumped to log in, they click the button … error message. Or the login info is wrong. Or the resources aren’t where you said they’d be.

Instead of diving in, they’re stuck troubleshooting. And when your first interaction with a new member is them feeling confused or frustrated? It doesn’t exactly build trust. 

Unclear Next Steps

And sometimes the problem isn’t missing info — it’s too much of it.

Your member logs in, and they’re hit with a wall of modules, links, videos, and bonus downloads. There’s no direction, no way to know where they should start. 

Their brain goes straight into power-saving mode → “I’ll just come back later” (narrator: but they didn’t come back later … they canceled before they even got started)

 

Your member shouldn’t have to work harder to get started than they did to buy.

 

If you’ve ever had new members emailing “I don’t have access” or ghosting before they even introduced themselves in the community, chances are your onboarding is leaking momentum.

No amount of amazing content will fix a rocky start. If members can’t get in, don’t feel welcome, hit broken links, or freeze in overwhelm, they’re already halfway out the door.

Want help plugging these leaks? This is exactly what I look for inside my Membership Systems Audit.

 

 

The Membership Onboarding Starter Pack

So the last section was about what not to do. Here’s your roadmap for setting up onboarding right.

Think of it as the starter pack every new member should get. 

When I set these systems up for clients, these are the four essentials we always build in, simply:

Instant Access

New members should be able to step inside the second they click purchase. That means:

• Automations unlock products, communities, and bonuses immediately.
• No waiting around for manual approvals.

Nobody wants to sit refreshing their inbox, wondering if they actually bought something real. Even a 12 hour wait is enough time for buyer’s remorse to sneak in. Instant access sends the message: “We’re ready for you. You belong here.”

Welcome Email

Your welcome email is the virtual handshake (or hug if that’s your thing) — don’t let the default platform-generated one do all the work. A strong welcome email:

• Lands instantly after purchase.
• Confirms their login info so they’re not wondering.
• Offers 1–3 crystal-clear next steps (and only a few – information overload is not the vibe).

Wanna go the extra mile? Add a short walkthrough video of the platform. Show them how to navigate it and where they should start. 

Checklist or Quick Wins

Nothing builds confidence and excitement faster than small wins. A simple “Start Here” checklist helps members feel like they’re making progress right away.

Super Mario World doesn’t throw you straight into Bowser’s castle. That wouldn’t be fun, now would it? 

Show your members the basics, let them get an easy win, and build up their momentum as they go.

Even something as small as:

• Step 1: Here’s where to log in.
• Step 2: Watch this 2-minute intro video.
• Step 3: Post your first hello in the community. (maybe give them a question to answer or some other sort of icebreaker)

That’s enough to give them the dopamine hit that fuels them to keep going.

Clear Support Channels

When members don’t know how to get help, they panic. Not like a “OMG MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE” panic. But a “OMG I SHOULD HAVE SAVED MY MONEY” panic.

And panicked members email you at midnight, DM you on Instagram, and leave angry comments in your Facebook group. 

Something that one of my clients said stuck out to me. She said she hated opening her inbox because the negativity brought her down. She didn’t have any systems in place that prevented the frustrated emails and DMs. (Well, until we worked together, that is 😏)

Here’s how you can set up clear & simple support options from the start:

• A visible FAQ page (include it in the welcome email and even your autoresponder).
• A support email that actually gets checked. Maybe you have a team member manage that inbox to keep your head in the game. 
• Even a little “Need help?” button in the dashboard lets people know that you’re there to help them.

You’ll always have questions and yes, sometimes, you’ll have complaints and frustrated members. But the goal is to make them feel confident that they know where to go for answers.

Bonus Tip: Guide the First Week

At minimum, a welcome email works. But onboarding isn’t just a one-and-done moment. It’s sort of like a journey through those first few days. 

A simple Day 1 → Day 3 → Day 5 → Day 7 email sequence can:

• Remind members they made the right choice.
• Encourage them to take that next small step.
• Keep their spark alive long enough to turn into a habit.

I mentioned Deanna’s onboarding in this post … BUT I’m gonna shout her out here too. Her onboarding sequence was, like, 3 months. But not in an overwhelming email-every-day way. Just some nice little check-ins along the way to make sure her members feel supported and invited to participate in events.

Wanna join The Playhouse and experience it for yourself?

 

When you have these in place, you create an experience that feels reassuring for your new members. 

• Instant access that says “you’re in”
• A welcome email that says “we’re glad you’re here”
• A checklist that says “you’re on the right path”
• Clear support channels that say “we’ve got your back”

Doesn’t that just feel so … refreshing? Inviting? Comforting? 😌

 

How Onboarding Saves You From Headaches

Good onboarding isn’t just for your members – it’s for you too!

Let’s be real, nothing tanks your Monday morning like logging in to a stack of frustrated emails, refund requests, and confused DMs because they were hoping they’d hear back faster.

Refunds don’t just sting financially, they chip away at your confidence as a business owner. And if your refund policy is strictly no refunds, you get stuck in inner turmoil where you either have to choose to go against your policy, or piss off the member even more. 

When your onboarding system is solid, you get to skip most of the drama. Here’s how:

A Lighter Inbox

Instead of opening your inbox to “I can’t log in” emails, you’re greeted by thank-yous and excited posts from new members! Good onboarding takes those repetitive questions off your plate because members already have the answers they need.

You get your mornings (and spark) back.

Fewer Refunds + Disputes

Most refund requests don’t happen because someone hated your program — they happen because they felt lost, ignored, or scammed in those first hours.

When members feel taken care of right away, that buyer’s remorse doesn’t set in. They don’t reach for the cancel button or file a chargeback because they’re confident they’re in the right place.

And honestly, it’s way less stressful for you to keep a happy member than it is to issue a refund to an annoyed one.

Higher Retention + Referrals

Confident members are sticky members. They stick around because they feel like they can actually use what they paid for. And happy members don’t just stay — they talk.

They tell their friends, colleagues, and peers all about it.

They’ll rave about how easy it was to get started, how everything just worked, and how valuable the membership feels right from the jump. That kind of word-of-mouth is a dream.

Real Scalability

Without strong onboarding, every new signup means extra work for you: chasing down access issues, sending login links, putting out fires. It’s not scalable because it’s not sustainable.

When the system runs on its own, you can add 10, 100, even 1000 members without drowning in admin work. 

Your business keeps growing, but it doesn’t add a ton more to your workload.

 

Refunds, disputes, and churn aren’t just money problems — they’re fun suckers. They drain your energy, shake your confidence, and make running your membership feel heavier than it should.

Strong onboarding flips the script. Instead of firefighting every new signup, you’ve got a system that takes care of your members and takes care of you.

Your inbox is lighter, your revenue steadier, and your community is stronger.

 

Would YOU Survive Your Own Onboarding?

Here’s a gut-check: if you joined your own membership tomorrow, would you stick around?

It’s easy to assume your onboarding is fine, but the truth is most leaks don’t show up until you walk through the process yourself. So let’s flip the script — instead of thinking like the owner, step into your member’s shoes for a minute.

Run yourself through this mini-audit and see how your system holds up:

1. Test Your Flow

Sign up with a fresh email and pretend you’re brand new. Did you get access instantly, or are you still waiting around for approval?

2. Check Your Emails

Do they land on time? Do the links actually work? Or are you clicking around, finding errors, and digging through spam?

3. Look at Your First Steps

Are they clear and doable in under 10 minutes, or do you drop people into the deep end right away?

4. Support Visibility

If something went wrong, would you instantly know where to get help? Or would you feel like you’re shouting into the void?

 

If you said no to any of the above, that’s your next system to fix.

 

How to Upgrade Your Onboarding Experience

Once the basics are solid, you can take your onboarding from functional to delightful. Think of this like moving from bare minimum hotel room to thoughtful boutique stay. Both get the job done, but one leaves you raving about the experience.

Here are four ways to make onboarding feel extra supportive (without adding a mountain of work for you):

Orientation Video

A quick welcome video inside the membership is like giving your members a personal tour instead of tossing them a map and hoping for the best. It can literally be a 2-3 minute Loom. 

The point is to show them: “Here’s where to start, here’s where you’ll find things, and here’s your first win.” That little bit of guidance can melt away confusion and give members the confidence to dive in right away.

Personalized Automations

Not all members join for the same reason. A brand-new beginner has different needs than a seasoned pro. Using tags or segments lets you customize their first steps so they feel like the onboarding was made just for them.

Example: a wellness membership could tag “new practitioners” vs. “established business owners.” Each group then gets onboarding tips that match their goals. It’s a small tweak that makes members feel deeply seen.

One-Week Check-In Email

That initial excitement can fade fast if members don’t take action in the first week. A short check-in email brings them back before they drift away:

“Hey, have you logged in yet? If not, no worries — here’s the first step to get started today.”

It’s a gentle nudge that says “we care, we see you, and you’re not forgotten.”

Surprise Bonus

Few things spark goodwill like an unexpected gift. It doesn’t have to be big — a mini resource, a bonus checklist, even a quick voice note.

The key is surprise. When members find something they weren’t expecting, it builds an emotional connection. It shifts you from “another program they bought” to “a business that cares.”

 

Your members won’t remember the tech setup. They’ll remember how you made them feel. And when onboarding makes them feel confident, cared for, and maybe even a little surprised, they’re much more likely to stick around long-term.

Confidence Is the Real Welcome Gift

Onboarding isn’t just about giving members access. It’s about giving them confidence.

Confidence to log in without feeling lost. Confidence that they made a good investment. Confidence that you’ve got their back.

Spend a little time on your onboarding now, and you’ll spend a lot less time chasing refunds, answering panicked emails, and wondering why people ghost.

And if you’d rather not figure it out solo? This is exactly what I clean up for clients inside my Membership Systems Audit & Cleanup. I’ll walk your whole member journey, plug the leaks, and set up systems that keep members supported from Day One.

Because when onboarding builds confidence, your membership stops feeling heavy and starts feeling like the community you always wanted to run.